There are so many occasions when we don’t understand what is going on with our children, why are they so sad, so naughty or simply so afraid all of a sudden.
Their little world reacts to the environment and the events very different than ours.
Kids are usually influenced by a great number of things.
This large amount of factors is mainly focused on their little world and on the persons they interact with.
Children are more receptive to details than we are and they respond to stimulus that we grown ups don’t react to when encountered.
This is why a child who knows the role in the school play too perfection, will back up and refuse to say a word when his turn comes to get up on the stage.
A similar situation is the one when a perfectly prepared student freezes in a school competition just when he is about to score.
If you ask yourself what went wrong with your child when that happen you should consider the fact that children associate the success they have with the amount of love and affection they receive from their family.
This is why under the pressure they snap or block refusing to participate. In their little mind they see us like omnipotent gods and feel they should deserve our love.
The child’s anxiety manifests also through the need of braking things or losing things. It also appears with the fear of going to school, in faking an illness or simply in lying to us about different things.
I don’t say this kind of behavior should be allowed or encouraged but we certainly need to pay more attention to a child that keeps on doing these things.
The need of attention becomes obvious when we pay attention to our kids only after they have done something wrong. This makes them, in the same time, afraid of our reaction and also we, unknowingly, are giving them a chance to ask for attention.
The fear of school comes when our little one gets bullied [child bullying] or mocked by other kids.
They are afraid to tell and they start acting out asking us without words to intervene. This is when we have to do something.
Faking of illness is something that comes natural to the kids. This nasty habit comes along when our little one has some secret agenda or simply he is afraid to face something.
I think that punishment is overrated when you have to do with lying. Children do everything to keep us focused on them. They need desperately our approval and our precious time spent giving them attention.
Every parent loves his or her child unconditionally. We strive every day to make their lives better that ours were and doing that we forget how important the attention of our own parents was, when we were children.
We have the best opportunities of education to offer them, the most wonderful toys and the most amazing books.
The only thing they really need for their future choices in life is our precious attention. That is what turns us from gods to parents.