Parents don’t realize the weapon they have in their arsenal.
If they understood the power of their sincere praise when they are proud of a job well done by their children, they would certainly want to learn how to use praise more effectively.
Praise is a key factor in the healthy growth of your child’s self esteem.
How to Praise Effectively?
It may seem like a simple thing, praising your child, but there are certain steps and techniques to maximize the positive effect that praise has on children.
The first step in praising effectively is to show your approval. Then describe to them the positive aspect of their actions and finally explain why you think what they did was great.
When showing your approval you use your actions and words to communicate your pride to your children. Being demonstrative in your affection is always welcome as well. Your child feels your pleasure and in turn they feel satisfied about themselves.
When you are describing why you are praising your child you want to be sure they understand fully why they deserve your delight. In fact, when you repeat the good deed your child has performed they are more likely to repeat the action again in the same situation.
Giving a reason to your child for your satisfaction in their actions gives them a direct link to behavior and consequences that ensue. You can point out that if homework is done when you get home from school there will be more time to play outside.
An example of effective praise practiced properly can sound something like this:
- The Approval
“Thanks for keeping your promise to do the dishes.”
- The Description
“You said you would do the dishes when you got off the phone with Becky and you followed through on your word.”
- The Reason
“When you keep your promises it lets me know you respect me and builds my trust in your decision making process.”
Do be careful you don’t find yourself praising every tiny thing your child does. This will only result in the praise losing its power.
That is not to say you shouldn’t praise your children for a job well done, it simply means that you don’t want to find yourself praising your child for things that really aren’t accomplishments at all.
Children will thrive on praise that is heart felt and don’t think they can’t tell the difference.